The Man with the Trolley

Posted on: November 5, 2015
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By Claire Wilson
[Fiction, Based on a True Story]

Sometimes I can’t decide what’s worse; the people who are obviously laughing at me or the ones that pretend I don’t exist. The subsequent wrenching humiliation is the reason that I normally do all my shopping online. I make sure that my mum’s going to be at home when it’s due to be delivered so that she is available to answer the door.
She couldn’t afford the internet bill last month and now our service has been cut off.
I’ve ran out of my favorite things, the things that I can’t function without. So I went to an actual supermarket and was reduced to a humiliation that I hadn’t been subjected to in so long.
The bleak November weather matched my mood. I felt like buying some healthy meals and fruit for my preferred food to hide behind. Things like chocolate cake, ginger biscuits and cola. However, I couldn’t afford to buy things that would go to waste.
The young couple that sniggered at me in the corner was the reason I placed another bag of crisps into the trolley. I didn’t even check what flavor they were.
To the old lady shaking her head in disgust; I saw you.
I walked more in 20 minutes that I have done in the last 20 months and I could smell myself. It was unpleasant.
Thank God for self-scanners, I thought to myself as I scanned my groceries as fast as the machine allowed without sounding an alarm. I didn’t want the close attention of any staff.
I hope I get the internet back soon.
I didn’t have enough money left over for a taxi home and had to rely on the bus, which resorted me to more negativity. I managed to sit with my head held high until I got to my bus stop. I knew things needed to change but just now I wasn’t ready; but change would come.




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